Record Boy Goes Clubbing:

Record Boy doesn’t want to upset anybody so real names will only be available on request…

What happens when you go out to see a guitar player you love play at an intimate venue, only to discover that he’s only there to back up his Broadway Baby wife?

You feel tricked that’s what!

Here’s what happened…My friend Jazz Man and I go to this small club inside a famous hotel and sitting on the stage warming up is Great Guitar Hero. We get a table right up front and get excited listening to his warm up runs. THIS IS GOING TO BE GOOD!

Jazz Man turns to me and asks if I remember the T.V. show "Baretta" and urges me to look at the table next to us. There sits Robert Blake. He acts cool like he doesn’t recognize Record Boy. I appreciate his self control. Unfortunately, the Baretta theme song , "Eye on the Sparrow" is now stuck in my head for days… "If you can’t do the time, than don’t do the crime… DON’T DO IT!"

The band takes the stage, Guitar Hero, bass player, drummer and Mr. New Age Piano Player. They open with an instrumental by Mr. New Age. Our eyes immediately begin to glaze over. When the "song" is over, Guitar Hero’s wife walks up to the mic and launches into a New Agey monolog. Then the band plays a samba and she sings some new agey rain song with measured Broadway abandon. When the music stops she does a dramatic poem reading, then sings again in her soulless style to music by Stravinsky.

Sound like your idea of an evening out? Robert Blake didn’t think so either. He walked out at this point. Jazz Man and I stayed hoping Guitar Hero would get a solo or something we could cling to.

He did get the opportunity to play a couple songs sans Broadway Baby. Those remaining cheered him wildly. Ms. Broadway was not amused.

When they finished the first set, Jazz Man and I congratulated Guitar Hero on his performance. When the band took the stage for the second set, Jazz Man and I decided to cut our losses and head for the exits.

Racing through my mind now are new lyrics to "Eye on the Sparrow":

"We love how you pick, but your wife makes us sick…" or

"Not one honest note has come out of your throat…" or

feel free to make up your own couplet!

Looking forward to hearing back from Robert Blake!